Abundant Living
A few weeks ago Marc told me about an opportunity through our local church to work with the Cardiff Crisis Pregnancy Centre. It's been closed for a few years due to various reasons and a few ladies from our church are re-opening it. My first reaction was "No way, can't do that!" Mainly out of fear and feelings of inadequacies. What do I have in common with anyone that might find themselves in that situation? Marc encouraged me to think about it and I said I would. But I didn't really. Just kept telling God that I was not qualified to do that.
The next Sunday at church when my mom and aunt were here, two of the three ladies that are re-opening this centre stood up front and announced a meeting that they were having for anyone who might be interested in this. I immediately was like, "Are you kidding me? Enough already!" For once I wasn't wrestling Addison since she was sitting with my mom and aunt and of course this is the one week that I actually get to hear any announcements. One of the sweet ladies said that she would like to encourage anyone to come- don't worry about feeling inadequate or scared- that she was too at first but God is way bigger than that, etc. etc. I left there feeling like I really should go to that meeting, but still telling God all about how I really felt about it.
Even the night of the meeting, I drove up to the church reciting my list of why I'm not up for this to God and even as I walked in I blurted out "I'm not really sure why I'm here!" Ha. But as they began speaking my heart melted and I realized that I should be involved in some way. See, not only is this a place for unwanted pregnancies but they do counseling for traumatic births and post natal depression. As she explained this I just started crying. Back in 2004 when Cerys was born and I endured both of these things- at the end of a very long year I felt that God spoke to me and said, "I will not waste this time in you life Charity!" I never really knew or understood how that was going to come into play, but now, 6 years later I see it very clearly. When I see a pregnant lady in town or at the doctor's office, I seriously have this urge inside of me to tell her that it might be tough and if she finds herself depressed she needs to know that it will not last forever and that's it's okay to admit it. I want to tell her that she has a God who loves her so much that will see her through the darkest times of her life.
I'm crying now. I can't seem to talk about this without crying. It seems so fresh on my heart all of the sudden. In just a little while I'm going down to the office space they have to meet with these three ladies for the first time. I woke up with a knot in my nervous stomach. I have no idea why I'm feeling so anxious over this. It seems like my mode of operation when doing something new- anxiety! It seems it's been my constant friend in life, at times worse than others. I sat down a few minutes ago to pray and read my Jesus Calling devotional book and of course it's for me today!
Jesus Calling- February 14
"Give yourself fully to the adventure of today. Walk boldly along the path of life, relying on your ever present Companion. You have every reason to be confident, because My presence accompanies you all the days of your life- and onward into eternity. Do not give in to fear or worry, those robbers of abundant living. Trust me enough to face problems as they come, rather than trying to anticipate them. Fix your eyes on Me, the author and perfecter of your faith...."
Did I mention that the verse I chose to memorize this month is John 10:10?
"The thief comes to steal and to kill and to destroy. I came that they may have life and have it more abundantly."
Whoa. Word spoken today.