Heart
Thank you for praying for my heart- I'm much better physically and emotionally! My doctor called this morning and everything was normal on my sonogram and it's just one of those random things we suppose. Also, about Wales, my heart is softening and God is working. Thank you. I'm sure most people don't expect people to say they don't feel like returning to their M field, but there you go. I'm just being honest and sharing my struggles between my flesh and what I know God has called us to do at this time in our life.
Last night at church God spoke so clearly to me through Milfred Minatrea. He will be speaking for the next few Wednesday nights at FBC McKinney. I've really been struggling with what are my gifts and "I have no talent" kind of thing for years. Yes, years. God continues to use Marc to speak to me and I just believe he is so wise. Marc has been telling me how much it means to the students that we work with to open up our home and have them over all the time. I love to cook for them and I enjoy having people in our home and just hanging out. I just kept telling him that that was not really a talent, etc. Marc also kept reminding me how random women at the girls' school would share personal things with me and not even really know me. I was just baffled by this. I would always come home with crazy stories.
As I look towards our return to Wales I kept wondering what was next, where was God asking me to "go and be?" The girls' school came to my mind and I realized how much I am missing chatting with the mums on the school yard before and after school. I'm still baffled that they share things with me- some deep things- and I always come away wondering why they open up to me, an American among them? Please, please know that I'm not "tooting my own horn" here. I'm so insecure it's not funny so I would never knowingly brag about myself. Gross. I'm just sharing how God has worked in my heart the last few weeks.
So while Milfred was teaching last night he asked us to stand so he could pray over those of us wanting to reach our neighborhood. I immediately thought about the girls' school and continuing to open our home to students. And how I have enjoyed having other mums over for coffee. I just started crying and the words he spoke where exactly what I needed to hear! He prayed for us to have the gift of hospitality and for people to be drawn to us in our area and for them to want what we have (Jesus). I was floored. I knew God was speaking to me. I knew it was Wales we would return to for this next season. Sometimes it takes me a while to come around, but I'm so thankful that God speaks so personally to me and you.
I find relief and peace in my heart today.