Stuff (It's a long post- just warning you)

First, let me start by asking is there anything like NASCAR on Sunday afternoon's to make you want to fall asleep on the couch?

I've been quiet on the blog, but not for lack of things going on around here. After our South Africa trip we were just trying to get back on Texas time and get use to doing parental things like changing diapers and wiping dirty mouths, etc. There is no gentle re-entry to parenting is there? Addison finally warmed back up to us after a few days. She was the biggest grouch and I was trying to find things to blame on it; teething, growth spurt, something...but after a few days she would finally snuggle with me again and wouldn't look at me like I had scarred her for life. So I *think* we are back to normal. Whatever normal is for us right now. I'm not really sure.

Bailey would like to show you here "light-up" shoes.

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She is very proud of them. I have been putting this off as long as I can. I think "light-up" shoes are the most hideous thing you could put on your feet, but she's 3 and when she did a fist pump and shouted "YES!" when I brought them home I knew it really didn't matter what I thought about them. To her they were the best shoes EVER.

This is what we woke up to this morning. About 6 inches of snow. In March. In Texas. It is beautiful and silent as it falls, but I'm over it now and would like to have the next 3 months as warm and sunny as possible. Thank you.

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There are several things swirling around in my head right now and I can't decide which thing to write about. I'm listening to the new Passion 2010 album right now and this song by Christy Nockels is about to make me bawl my eyes out. A Mighty Fortress. "We will keep our eyes on you, we will keep our eyes on you. We can set our hearts on you." I think this has been the cry of my heart since coming back on stateside in December. There is so much screaming for my attention here that it just makes me want to curl up in a ball, put my fingers in my ears and just sing LA LA LA LA LA till it all goes away.

Maybe it's because this is "home" or maybe it's because it's America...I'm not really sure. But it just seems like you are busy here for the sake of being busy. Before we came on our stateside I would dream about going to Target, the mall, eating out, etc every day of my time here and just having a blast. Of course that is so unrealistic in many ways but the grass is greener right? I have been so distracted here that it was getting to me. I was wanting to go shopping every day just because I could. I wanted to buy stuff that I didn't need just because everything was so cute. I wanted to go to Sonic every day at happy hour just because it was easy. I stopped exercising because I "didn't have time." I am also ashamed to admit that I was not seeking God like I needed to be. I was not setting time alone each day to spend with My Father, to ask Him to help me get through the day. To help me be a good wife and husband, to serve my family selflessly.

I think it all caught up with me after our SA trip. We are halfway through our stateside right now and it was time for me to stop and re-evaluate. Get some things sorted as they say in the UK. One week ago today I stopped caffeine cold turkey. I really didn't think I was drinking that much, but since being back in the States I was having way too much. I felt horrible all day Monday and Tuesday. By Tuesday afternoon I had such a migraine that I vomited three times. I was MISERABLE. It was while I was laying on the bed, feeling about half -dead that God just spoke to my heart. I have been lacking discipline in a lot of areas of my life. Too much Coke, not any exercise and very little time alone with Him to just name a few. It's time to quit letting my physical being be in charge. I can't just eat or drink whatever I feel like having. So, this past week in the grace of God I have stayed off Cokes and caffeine. I have been finding small amounts of time to spend with Him, either reading the Bible or devotional. I'm going through Breaking Free right now, but I didn't consider that my personal study time- I need to be spending time praying and reading the Word apart from that. I also went and got fitted for some new running shoes. I left mine in SA on purpose, it was time to get some new shoes. And no my new ones don't light-up! I have not been running since before I had Addison, so I feel it's time to get back to it. It's not going to be easy.

I want to keep my eyes on Him. To set my heart on Him. If I don't purposefully (is that a word?) set my heart on Him, I will set it on other things. Just as I've done lately.

I think I better leave it at this today. Thanks for reading if you made it this far.

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